What About the Baptism of Young Children?
A young child (in this case, seven years old) wants to be baptized because he heard his mother say that those who are not baptized cannot go to heaven. He is an intelligent little boy with a wonderful, pure heart, and he cried when he heard his mother say what she did. He is serious about this issue and keeps bringing it up. When he is not in a serious mood, he acts like a typical seven-year-old kid, getting into anything and everything. How should a child like this be counseled on this subject?
A few key principles can help us find good solutions to this situation.
Be Biblically Accurate
First of all, it is a mistake to generalize and assert that "all who are not baptized" will be forbidden entrance into heaven. Many in heaven will have never been baptized. For instance, thousands upon thousands of infants and young children die before reaching an age of accountability. They will not be lost or enter "limbo," as alleged in Catholic theology. Many others are mentally disabled and thus do not need God's pardon.
Young, innocent children must be assured that God loves them and that they are in no danger of being lost. Mothers and fathers should be cautious with their language to prevent problems encountered in this area.
That aside, we need to raise some thought-provoking issues for serious reflection.
Baptism Is for the Accountable
Exactly when does a person become accountable to God for his conduct?
This question cannot be answered with chronological precision. Children mature at different rates. Genetics, environment, education—all these factors contribute to one's spiritual development. Even Jesus grew in intellectual awareness (Luke 2:52). No one can "x-ray" another person's soul and precisely determine their level of responsibility.
Our children should be taught the word of God from their very earliest days. However, they must be allowed to mature sufficiently to make an independent commitment to Christ of their own will. This decision must be based on their personal comprehension.
It is not uncommon for parents to nudge or pressure their children into making decisions they are far too young to appreciate. Remember this: becoming a Christian is the gravest, most consequential decision a person will ever be called upon to make.
Baptism Is for the Lost
No one needs immersion unless they are lost, and, therefore, in danger of hell. Baptism is not simply a ritual for sincere, tender, or devout people. It is for condemned people—folks who will spend eternity separated from God if they die without forgiveness.
Being intellectually qualified to obey the gospel entails far more than being able to recite the elements of the plan of salvation, which many children can do. It involves more than a tender little heart telling Mom he wants to "get baptized," like other children. It involves more than feeling guilty for sneaking a cookie that had been denied. It means the person is lost! Could we let this point sink in?
One of the most influential arguments an atheist could make would be to call attention to the sweet youngsters that some baptize, and then charge: "These people believe that hell is full of these children; otherwise they would not be immersing them for the forgiveness of their sins."
Do we actually believe that a seven-year-old child will be separated from God forever if he dies?
Baptism Is for the Responsible
No one is amenable to the gospel of Christ who is incapable of assuming the responsibilities connected with conversion. Jesus taught that those who wish to follow him must be willing to separate from loved ones—even parents—if necessary. They must be daring enough to forfeit their lives if it comes to that (Matthew 10:37; Luke 14:26; Revelation 2:10).
How could a small child possibly be held accountable to such a rigorous standard? Is a young child physically, emotionally, or socially capable of accepting such a challenge?
Baptism Is for the Committed
The New Testament symbolizes our union with Christ as a "marriage" (see Romans 7:4; Ephesians 5:22ff). One's relationship with the Son of God is the most important commitment one will ever make.
Why is it that some parents, who would never dream of allowing their small children to enter into a physical marriage, will, nonetheless, permit them to "get baptized" simply because they are afraid that disallowing that urge would discourage the youngster from developing spiritual interests in the future? When we tell our immature children that they are "too young" to date, do we entertain the illusion that such will deter them from ever wanting to marry?
When a youngster prematurely asks for baptism, if parents handle the matter gently and compassionately, the child will not be damaged spiritually.
Baptism Is for One Who Understands
The respected Gus Nichols used to point out that belief in Jesus, as the virgin-born Son of God, is essential to being baptized in a scriptural fashion. He would then observe that one cannot endorse the concept of the virgin birth unless he comprehends the process of a natural birth.
His central point was this. Becoming a Christian depends on being adequately taught, understanding what is taught, and committing to a threshold level of very significant doctrinal truths. This goes beyond a mere recital of specific oft-rehearsed phrases.
Finally, I'll conclude with some points to emphasize.
Be Careful with Arbitrary Conclusions
The younger a person is when they are baptized, the less likely they are to be mature enough to be morally accountable. However, sweeping generalizations about another's baptism based on an arbitrary age are ill-advised.
Whether or not someone else sufficiently understands the deeper issues of life, sin, salvation, and moral guilt requires carefully probing the conscience. Drawing a line at an arbitrary age (e.g., 13 years old) as the marker before which someone can't be baptized or beyond which they should be baptized is not biblical.
Far too often, though, adults baptized at a very young age have questioned whether they understood what they were doing or whether they were accountable. Some have chosen to remove all doubt by submitting to the command again—with a full understanding of what they are doing. Safe is better than sorry.
Occasionally, a minister will encounter a case in which a child appears to lack the moral responsibility he believes is required. In such a situation, he may feel strongly that he cannot, in good conscience, participate. No one should be pressured to participate in a baptism that violates his convictions.
Be Prepared with Gentleness
There is no doubt that small children will occasionally request baptism—when it is clear that they do not comprehend the gravity of the situation.
A little boy once responded to the invitation after a church service. In his conversation with the minister, he said he wanted to be baptized and to ask Jesus for a new pair of roller skates! The minister put his arm around the little fellow, commended him for his sincerity, and said they would study more as he grew older. The child was delighted with that recommendation.
We should not fear lovingly restraining immature children from making the grave mistake of going through the motions of something they neither need nor truly understand.
We must also remind ourselves that it is just as serious to practice semi-infant baptism as it is to practice outright infant baptism. To baptize someone who is not lost is to do them a severe injustice that could have eternal consequences.
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